This blog post has long been in my head. I hope that my writing will, kahit konti, will express enough what I feel.
After I came home from my mission (September 2014), my mother told me all that I missed during my one and a half years of absence. She told me that one of my titas, whom I fondly call “Mommy Siopao,” is suffering from cancer- exactly the same cancer that took away the life of my Tita Juvy years ago. She died 2 months later (exactly on my mother’s birthday). June the following year, my grandfather died because of old age (just a few weeks before my birthday).
Did I feel sad? Yes.
Losing a loved one is not easy. It is painful. It is heart breaking. What is more painful is to see your family hurt because someone in your family passed away.
truth be told. I feel more at peace than sad. Why? I owe it on my mission. If I had not served a full-time mission, I will not have a better understanding that death is not the end of everything. It is one of those “stops” that we must pass before going to our final destination.
When I learned that Mommy is suffering from cancer, I knelt down in prayer and asked Heavenly Father that He may give us strength the pain of seeing our loved one suffer from this illness. That whatever happens, we may feel peace and have the courage to accept what will happen to my beloved tita. And, this prayer was answered when my father called and told us that Mommy passed away already. It was painful but peace swept away the sadness of my soul. I was comforted by the fact that I know Mommy is resting now, waiting for us to be reunited on the other side.
And, someday, we will meet again and never to part again.
this knowledge and testimony was put into test when I learned that a college classmate’s sister died because of leukemia. I never met her sister. But her passing away had a huge effect on me. At first, I did not understand but as I kept on reading posts about her I realized why. She is still young (mid 20s). A woman full of dreams. A woman who stands up for what she knows is right. A woman who is dearly loved by her family and friend. A woman who is greatly admired by her students. Nanghinayang ako sa buhay na sana meron pa siya. I was so sad that I felt that her death made a huge soul on my chest. I spent the next weeks reading on whatever post I can read about her.
Then, I realized why her death was so hard for me to accept more that the death of my Mommy and Lolo. It was because in her family no one knows about The Plan of Salvation. The knowledge that one day as they come to accept the Gospel of Jesus Christ, their family will be reunited. That, nothing will separate them anymore.
I don’t know how I got through that moment. I found myself asking “why did she die in a very young age?” But, I do know that one of those nights the Spirit whispered to me and I did remember about the wonderful Plan of Salvation- Our Father’s Plan of Happiness.
the Savior died that we may all live.
(Click this to watch our Church’s Easter greeting. 😉)